A safety plan is a personalized strategy.
This page describes what safety planning is. It does not replace working with an advocate. For an individualized plan, call 310-547-9343 . A trained DV advocate will work with you, in your language, at your pace, free of charge.
What a safety plan is.
A safety plan is a personalized, practical set of strategies for staying safer in the situation you are actually in, whether you are leaving, thinking about leaving, or staying.
A safety plan is not a checklist that looks the same for everyone. It is built with you, by you, alongside an advocate who understands DV. The plan considers your relationship, your living situation, your children if you have them, your finances, your immigration status if relevant, your health, your work, and the level of risk you are facing.
Safety planning is voluntary, free, confidential, and available in your language. You decide what is in your plan. The advocate’s job is to help you think through what you may not have considered, not to tell you what to do.
What a safety plan is not.
A safety plan is not a guarantee that nothing bad will happen. It is not a substitute for calling 911 in an emergency. It is not a legal document. It is not the same as a restraining order, though restraining orders may be part of one. And it is not something you do alone. There is no version of safety planning that works as well by yourself as it does with a trained advocate.
Five categories. One plan.
Safety planning typically covers five overlapping areas. Your advocate will work through each with you, focusing on what is most relevant to your situation.
Strategies for moments of escalation: identifying warning signs, where to go in your home if something starts, how to keep important documents and a small bag accessible, how to get help without alerting your partner. We help you plan for the situation you are in, not the situation we wish you were in.
Where you will go, who you will tell, how to leave safely, what to take with you, how to protect your children, how to handle money, transportation, and pets. Leaving is statistically the most dangerous moment. Preparation matters.
New routines, changing locks, blocking accounts, restraining orders if appropriate, how to talk to your children’s school and your employer, how to manage shared custody safely, how to think about new technology that could be used to track you.
Reducing harm in place: knowing your local emergency resources, having a code word with a trusted friend, small steps to maintain financial autonomy, planning for moments of escalation. There is no judgment for staying. Many survivors stay for reasons that are real: economic, immigration-related, family, faith. Safety planning works for any decision you make.
Phone monitoring, location sharing, social media, shared cloud accounts, smart home devices, and how an abuser might be using technology to track or control you. Technology safety planning is a specialized area. Bring up anything that feels off and the advocate will help you investigate.
What a safety plan can’t do.
Safety planning reduces risk. It does not eliminate it. The most dangerous decisions are made by the person causing the harm, not by the survivor, and no plan, however careful, fully accounts for another person’s choices.
Safety planning works best in combination with other steps: shelter, legal services, support groups, therapy, and the relationships you maintain with people you trust. No single intervention is a complete answer. Rainbow’s job is to help you assemble the combination that fits your life.
Safety planning is also iterative. The plan that fits today may not fit in three months. As your situation changes, the plan changes with it. Coming back to safety planning is not “starting over.” It is the work continuing.
Safety planning when there are children in the home.
Children change safety planning in specific ways. Not because children are fragile, but because a safe parent is their single most protective factor, and because leaving, staying, and co-parenting all look different when children are involved. A Rainbow advocate will work through this with you directly. The overview below is meant to prepare you for that conversation, not to replace it.
Survivors who are parents often carry the additional weight of believing that staying is safer for the children, or that leaving will be used against them in custody. Both fears are real and both are navigable with planning. You do not have to figure this out alone.
What a plan with children typically considers.
Safety planning when there are pets in the home.
Abusers commonly threaten or harm pets to exert control. Rainbow House and Villa Paloma both accommodate pets on-site, and Rainbow will not ask you to choose between your safety and your animal. Include the animal in your go-bag planning: carrier, 3 days of food, medication, vaccination records if accessible, and a familiar blanket.
For livestock or animals we cannot house on-site, we partner with rescues who board confidentially in your name, not the shelter’s. Ask the advocate about this on the call.
Make the plan with someone who knows.
Reading about safety planning is a start. The plan itself is built on the call.
A trained DV advocate will work with you, free, confidential, in your language. 24/7.
Read about how DV is defined and recognized before calling.
If this is an emergency, return to the Get Help triage page.
Quick Exit (bottom-left) leaves this page immediately. If you are in immediate danger, call 911.